Serious Illness and Patients!

One thing that has come to my mind constantly in the last 20 years of my pediatric practice. Whenever I make a diagnosis of a serious / incurable disease of a child before the parents , I always get 3 questions invariably.

  1. Are you sure about the diagnosis? – I understand that he/she does not distrust the ability of the doctor but his mind, like any other parent, is not ready to see the pain of his/her beloved child. They are not mentally prepared to accept the diagnosis as there was no Idea that such a diagnosis would be made. Maybe it’s a question arising out of hope that things would change later.
  2. Is the disease curable? – This question arises out of acceptance of the problem. And this is how they are looking for available solutions. it also shows readiness to do everything for the child, if the situation can be improved, by any means .
  3. Did this problem arise out of our fault? – And this is probably the only question that makes me sad. The most miserable situation as a parent is to see the child’s pain and not be able to do anything about it. When the mind cannot blame anyone else, it starts blaming itself. The guilt of not being able to do enough for the child builts -up in parents mind, as they wanted to give all the happiness, prosperity and good health to their child.
    And it is our duty not only as a doctor but also as a human being to give them confidence, to prepare them for a long fight, to do enough to prevent guilt. At the same time, society, relatives should also try to strengthen their morale instead of blaming them or their upbringing for such an illness.
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